Wednesday Write-In #65

This week’s words were:

First date :: competition :: sprint :: prayer :: rats



Final Vows

‘Rats. My hands are shaking so badly. I didn’t think… well. I didn’t think they would. You know?’

‘That’s normal. You’re nervous. Completely to be expected. Now – hold still. I want to fix your hair, just here.’

‘Thanks. I wasn’t sure how to get the veil to sit right.’

‘No problem. Look – if it helps, I know how you feel. I was where you are, not so very long ago.’

‘Long enough ago, all the same.’

‘Hey! Cheeky… Anyway. You know what I’m saying. This isn’t a ‘first date.’ You’re not in a competition, with yourself or any other woman. This is your day.’

‘Yeah. I know that. Thanks.’

‘It’s easy to forget it, though. When you’re facing the altar, and it’s just you and Him…’

‘It’ll be wonderful, though. Won’t it?’

‘The best thing you’ll ever experience, in this life.’

‘No pressure.’

‘No pressure. Now, shall I leave you in peace? You’re good to go, when it’s time?’

‘Yes, sure. And thanks, again. Without you – well, without you I wouldn’t even be here. But perhaps a little quiet prayer, just – you know. Before I make my way to the church. It would probably help.’

‘Wise idea. And – hey. Will you do one thing for me?’

‘Sure. Anything. What?’

‘Don’t do like I did, and sprint up the aisle. God will wait for you, okay? Trust me.’

‘Oh – yeah. He’s been waiting all my life, I guess. He can wait a few more seconds, right?’

‘Right. See you in church, Sister Dominic.’

‘Wow, that sounds good.’

‘Doesn’t it? Such a well-chosen name.’

‘Well, thank you. I haven’t earned it yet, though. I hope I’ll be worthy of it, too.’

‘Oh, I have faith enough for us both. You’ll do just fine.’

‘With your help, and His.’

‘Both of which you can rely on.’

‘I know. Thank you, again.’

‘You look beautiful, you know. You’re shining.’

‘Really? That’s what love does to a girl, I guess.’

‘Exactly. Say a prayer for me, won’t you?’

‘For you, always. Forever.’


14 thoughts on “Wednesday Write-In #65

  1. Elaine McKay

    Very human, and I think that’s wonderful as quite often religious people are portrayed in a one dimensional way. Great dialogue like the others said. Well done.

    1. SJ O'Hart Post author

      Thanks – I was definitely trying to go for the whole ‘multi-dimensional’, hidden depths idea. Really appreciate your comment, as always. 🙂

      1. Godefroy D.

        Oh well I hope it didn’t come across as an awkward comment then x3 what was the intended effect ?

      2. SJ O'Hart Post author

        Gosh, no! Your comment was lovely, and very welcome, and I thank you for it.

        I’m going to leave my intended effect under wraps. Clearly, I didn’t manage it correctly, and the fact that nobody picked up on it is very valuable feedback in itself. Thank you for reading and for commenting. 🙂

  2. emmaleene

    I love how you set this up like a mother-daughter conversation the morning of her wedding! Because I knew you wrote it I was waiting for a clever twist but still didn’t guess until ‘Him’. You have a real skill for allowing a story to unfurl itself and meander so naturally through dialogue. Not an easy thing to achieve & you always make it look so easy! Well done.

    1. SJ O'Hart Post author

      Thanks so much! I sometimes feel like paring things back and just using dialogue, but I’m sort of sorry I didn’t go for more exposition in this one. Thanks, Emmaleene.


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